Before I begin, let me give you a little warning: this is an extremely complicated recipe. I know, I know. I’m usually about more simple, pared down, accessible recipes that employ techniques most home cooks can execute. But that is not the case with this dish, which takes a pretty high amount of skill to get right. It’s a cross between a French mousse and a frozen custard, but the balance required with adding ingredients in the right order, then carrying out the chilling stage in just the right increments…it’s a lot of pressure folks. Get ready for the stress.
Okay, so I totally made that up.
The recipe I’m sharing with you right now was shared with me by a fellow soccer mom a couple of weeks ago. She and I were visiting while watching our daughters completely annihilate the opposing team (not that I’m competitive or anything) and she mentioned in total passing that she’d made her friend a dessert containing three ingredients. She really didn’t tell me the precise recipe or the exact instructions, but I was intrigued enough when I left that soccer game that I vowed to give it a whirl sometime in the next week or two.
And one day last week, I did! It took all of ten minutes. And it was yummy.
Let’s do it.
Set a tub-o-Cool Whip out on the counter. Let it sit for ten to fifteen minutes.
Don’t pretend like you don’t like Cool Whip. No, it’s not freshly whipped cream…but you know what? I don’t think it’s trying to be freshly whipped cream. It’s trying to be Cool Whip.
I admire Cool Whip for that.
Unwrap a Hershey Bar with Almonds and place it on a microwave-safe plate.
Nuke it for 30 to 45 seconds, just long enough to soften the whole thing.
Stir it around to make sure it’s all melted, then–and this is very important–freak out, lose all self control, and lick the whole thing off the plate.
Then start all over with a new Hershey bar.
Melt it and stir it around. Do not repeat the previous step of licking it off the plate.
Crack open the Cool Whip–it should be slightly soft by now–and add a couple of tablespoons of brewed, cold coffee.
Stir it gently to combine…
Then dump in the melted (but cooled) Hershey bar.
As soon as you start to stir in the Hershey bar, you’ll see what starts to happen: because the Cool Whip is, well, cool, it will turn the melted Hershey bar into a solid state again. Only now, since the Hershey bar is melted and therefore able to be evenly distributed, the solid pieces wind up being tiny particles. If you want a little more of the chocolate bits going on, just add in a second melted Hershey bar! Of course, that would actually be a third since you licked the first one off the plate…
But that’s between you and your maker.
Refrigerate or serve right away in a pretty champagne glass to make it look extra fancy. This is pretty rich, so a little goes a long way!
Seriously, guys: all regard for high-end cuisine aside, this is surprisingly and hilariously tasty.
But wait.
That’s not all.
I refroze most of the concoction while I went to San Francisco over the weekend, and I had some when I returned. I actually wound up preferring this more frozen, “ice cream” texture.
This was fun and easy, and I learned something new about adding melted chocolate bars to a frozen substance. Now I’m having all sorts of fantasies about adding melted chocolate the next time I make blackberry ice cream. Interesting!
Come on, foodies. Don’t turn away from the love. You know you want some.
(Happy Thanksgiving, Canada!)
